Did you and your ex have an amicable divorce or was it really nasty?
As a divorced parent, do you worry that your ex might make malicious remarks about you, especially to your children? Does he or she blame you for all of the family problems that have occurred over the years – are you the bad guy?
During this tug-of-war that sometimes goes on, some children may exhibit emotional detachment from one or both parents. One likely cause is parental alienation.
When do derogatory remarks turn into harmful psychological phenomenon that psychologists refer to as “parental alienation syndrome”? Parental alienation syndrome occurs when one parent consciously or maybe unconsciously brainwashes your children against you. Sometimes it is combined with your own children bad-mouthing you. This is when permanent damage can take place and totally ruin your relationship with your child.
The following are some warning signs of possible alienation coming from you or your ex:
- Discussing details about your marriage/divorce with your children
- Allowing your children to decide if they want to visit with their other parent
- Refusing to be flexible with visitation schedule
- Encouraging your child’s anger toward the other parent
- Asking your child to choose you over the other parent
- Using a child to spy on his or her own parent
- Listening in on your child’s conversations with other parent
- Breaking promises to your child
It’s hard to say why a parent would want to damage his or her child’s relationship with the other parent. Perhaps that parent:
- Has unresolved anger towards the other parent
- Has a personality disorder, such as paranoia or narcissism
- Is insecure with their own parenting skills
- Has unresolved issues from their own childhood
No one really knows why a child would buy into the alienating parent’s brainwashing, but they may feel the need to protect him or her. Perhaps they just want to avoid anger or rejection.
If these symptoms sound familiar to you, you need the assistance and expertise of Amy M. Montes, an Orange County family law attorney. Amy is dedicated to protecting your rights, your children’s rights, and your relationship with your children.
We invite you to call our law firm today at 714-731-8600 to arrange a free consultation with our best OC divorce lawyer to discuss your family law issue.
