Her Mother Agrees Because she is Going Into the Military
Joint custody is when parents who do not live together have equal say in making life decision for the child. Parents can have joint custody if they are divorced, separated, or not living together. If both parents agree to share custody of the child, then it is much easier to have it written up and approved by the courts.
First of all, you and the other parent will want to know what kind of joint custody you want, and what works best in your arrangement. Parents can have:
- Joint legal custody: Legal custody is when a parent has the right and obligation to make major life decision for the child. In joint legal custody, parents share the right to make decisions regarding the child’s schooling and medical care. If awarded joint legal custody, you must allow the other parent to contribute to each decision about the child’ upbringing. If you do not include the other parent, they can take you to court to have the custody arrangement enforced.
- Joint physical custody: Physical custody means a parent has the right to have the child live with them. Joint physical custody is awarded when the child spends their time with both parents equally. This kind of custody is usually chosen when the parents live reasonably close to each other, because it is less stressful on the child if they can easily maintain a stable routine in their lives, as well as nurture a relationship with both parents.
- Joint legal and physical custody: In this type of custody, parents spend equal significant amounts of time living with the child, and share the right to make major life decisions for the child.
In a joint custody arrangement, you will need to determine a child-care schedule that works with each parent’s work requirements, housing arrangements, and that aligns with the child’s needs. If the parents cannot work out a schedule or cannot agree on one, the court will impose and arrangement. A common schedule might be:
- the child splits weeks between each parent’s household
- the child alternates months, years, or six-month periods in each parent’s household
- the child spends weekends and holidays with one parents, and weekdays with the other
Joint custody is sometimes favored because the child gets to continue having a relationship with both parents. It is also a practical option because it can lessen the burden of parenting for each parent. Joint custody also has its cons though, like that the child has to be constantly shuttled around, parental friction from having to constantly be in communication, and the cost of maintaining two homes for the child. Take all these factors into consideration when making any custody decisions.
It is always recommended that parents sharing custody work out a parenting plan; when one parent is in the military and is unsure about future deployment, it is especially important to work out alternate plans that cater to various possibilities. Commonly, parents share joint custody and one parent is in the military, the civilian parent will take care of the child when the other parent is deployed.
