The holidays are now upon us. As parents, it’s only natural that you want to spend every minute with your children – they are growing up so fast – time is passing by too quickly.
Holidays are a time to spend with family and friends – it’s a time of celebration, not a time to argue and stress out over family issues.
Here are some tips for the divorced parents at holiday time about what to do:
- Do plan ahead. Be specific with dates, times, places to be. Children like to know what’s
going on – it’s better to be more detailed than too vague. - Do be flexible and willing to change your plans if need be.
- Do involve your children in the plans, but don’t give them too much power in the decision
making. Ask for feedback and input. - Do create new traditions – expand the holidays, celebrate an occasion twice.
The following are tips for the divorced parents about what not to do:
- Don’t have an emotional meltdown while you’re with your children. Keep a lid on bad and negative feelings.
- Don’t play detective on your ex. Never probe your children for information on what’s going on in their other house. It’s not your business.
- Don’t over-react or under-react to anything your children tell you about their other parent.
- Don’t wait for holiday time to announce a surprise to your children, such as you have a new partner or you are moving.
- Don’t buy gifts, especially big ones for your children, without sharing the information with your ex. Maybe the two of you can buy a big gift, like a bicycle, together.
- Following the above advice, hopefully, will make your holiday season go much more smoothly. Holiday time, when you’re divorced, can affect you emotionally. Taking the time to incorporate these do’s and don’ts into your holidays can prove to be beneficial for you and your family, making the holidays as uncomplicated as possible.
If you have any questions regarding co-parenting at holiday time or any other family issues, contact the Orange County family law offices of Amy M. Montes. We are committed to protecting your rights and interests and those of your children today, tomorrow and during the holiday season.
