After a divorce, most people go through a myriad of emotions, including anger, sadness, hurt, and disappointment. This is completely natural as your life is changing.
Many people are afraid of the emotion of anger because they don’t know how to express it in ways that are helpful instead of harmful. Anger teaches us how we are thinking or behaving. Blaming anger on another person comes from feeling like a victim and gets us off the hook from having to take personal responsibility for ourselves.
No matter why you are experiencing anger, it is essential to deal with it straight forward. The following are tips that will help you deal with your anger – in a positive way:
- Determine the root of your anger
- Talk to a friend or journal your angry feelings so you can work through them; don’t keep them locked inside
- Don’t suppress your emotions; find a safe place to vent, such as punching your pillow or screaming while in the shower
- You have a right to feel angry; don’t worry about what other people will think
- Take a walk or do some kind of exercise
Whatever you do make sure that if children are involved, you do not take your anger out on them. After all, they are going through their own emotions and need your support and love. All they know is that their family is splitting apart.
The rate of divorce is high today – there is a 50/50 chance for every marriage. It takes a lot of work to be married and it takes a lot of work to go through a divorce. Allowing emotions to come out is better than suppressing them – only to have them come back at a later date. Deal with your anger and other emotions to help yourself heal properly.
The best way to respond to anger is by not responding at all. It may seem difficult to not defend yourself when confronted by an angry spouse, but this approach does work.
For more information on how to diffuse anger with your spouse in a divorce case, contact the Orange County family law offices of Amy M. Montes.
We understand the serious emotional and financial hardships often associated with divorce. Contested divorces can be stressful and intimidating for children. We strive to guide our clients through the legal system. We follow a holistic approach to help you discover a new beginning, as well as peace of mind. Speak to one of our attorneys and schedule a free consultation to fully discuss your case.
