There are few things that you will ever have to endure that are as trying as going through a divorce.
Couples going through a divorce are not the only ones having a hard time – what about the children involved?
For children of any age, divorce can be stressful, sad, and definitely confusing. Many children don’t understand why their parents are splitting up, causing them to feel uncertain about their future.
Behavioral issues have been known to arise due to the divorce of the parents. As a parent, you can make the process and its effects less painful for your children. Helping your children cope with divorce means providing stability in your home and attending to your children’s needs with a reassuring, positive attitude.
This won’t be easy; you can help your children get through this unsettling time and help them emerge from it feeling loved, confident and strong. Make your children’s well-being your top priority.
Many children, especially young ones, believe that it’s their fault that their parents are separating. Watch out for behavior that is not common or different in your child, such as listening better or picking up his or her toys. This is the best time to reassure your child that the divorce is not his or her fault and that both parents love him or her.
Do you have a toddler? If so, you know that he or she has a hard time expressing feelings. Some toddlers will get frustrated and direct this angry behavior in other directions, such as friends, family members or their own toys. They may express their frustrations in anger, whining or by sulking.
Some younger children may actually separate physically from one parent; they may experience an emotional separation from one or both parents. Perhaps one or both parents are now not spending enough time with this child.
The following are helpful hints to help your children adjust to divorce:
- Your patience, reassurance, and listening ear can minimize tension as children learn to cope with their new circumstances.
- By providing and keeping their daily routines untouched, you remind your children they can count on you for stability, structure, and care.
- By maintaining communication and a civilized working relationship with your ex-spouse, you can help your children avoid the stress that comes with watching their parents arguing all the time.
The anxiety and anger over the situation can get in the way of clear decision-making and the uncertainty about your future can sometimes be paralyzing. At times like these it is important to have an experienced divorce lawyer by your side.
Contact the Orange County family law offices of Amy M. Montes for an objective view and who can stay focused on your best interests and keep the process moving forward so you can get on with your life.
