For children, divorce can be as stressful and confusing as it is for you, the parent. As a parent, it is your duty to help your children cope with divorce – to make the process less painful for them.
Be equipped to help your children handle the news. Before you sit down to tell your children about the divorce, prepare what you are going to say. Deal with your own anxieties before you come face to face with theirs.
Make sure you are honest and truthful with them and use a kid-friendly explanation – one they will understand. Make sure they know they are loved by you and their other parent. Tell them about the changes that will take place. Don’t be critical about your ex. Answer their questions.
Children of any age may feel angry or uncertain of what will happen. Even though you are going through uncertainty and emotions you didn’t even know you have, you must make sure your children’s well-being comes first – by using a reassuring and positive attitude.
There are ways you can help them adjust:
- Patience, reassurance, listening to them
- Do not change their routines – the ones they rely on
- Tell them over and over again that you are always there for them – no matter what
- Try to stay calm with your ex – don’t allow your children to witness an argument
Always support your children by helping them express their emotions; listen to their feelings and never get defensive. Your job is to handle misunderstandings, assuage fears, reassure and show your unconditional love to them. If you stay calm, your children will feel more at ease.
At the end of the day, your children need to know that your divorce isn’t their fault.
Your divorce may be the most significant legal and financial even of your life. You need a family law attorney who is focused on obtaining an optimal result for you.
Contact the Orange County Law Offices of Amy M. Montes our legal team believes that divorce and other complicated family law matters deserve our focused attention. We take time to get to know our clients, so we can tailor our representation to their unique needs.
